July 28, 2006
• When Bill first announced he was retiring in two years, I was like, "Damn, you'd think he'd at least wait around until after Vista shipped."
• Microsoft just announced Vista will ship "when it's ready." What, now you're admitting you're never going to ship it?
• I just found out that the home edition of Vista will come bundled with Duke Nukem Forever.
• We're talking about an operating system update that is now six years late. Six years! If I had a girlfriend who was that late, I'd be playing video games with my kid right now. (But not, you know, under Vista.)
• Microsoft now has completely cornered the market on two types of products: "not shipping" and "not profitable." How do they make money? Volume!
• This subtitle cracks me up: "In wake of Vista, [Steve Ballmer] says Microsoft will never again wait 5 years to upgrade a major product." Uh, gee, ComputerWorld, have you ever seen a boat? Because, the wake comes AFTER the boat goes by. This boat is still in drydock.
• You've got to admire the temerity of a company that sells you an operating system that will brand you a pirate if you install too much third-party software or change video cards, and name this feature "Windows Genuine Advantage." I'm trying to imagine some little guy at Microsoft asking the marketing department, "Uh, hey, guys, people are switching to better, open operating systems. Seriously, all BS aside, what's our message? What's the genuine advantage for people running Windows?" And marketing is all, "That's it! That's what we'll call our obtrusive new system for making people's computers work even less reliably in order to make us more money! Genuine Advantage! Genius!" And the original guy is all, "Whaaa... what just happened?"
'For better and for worse, there's no other company that would be attempting to get into that business at this time... Nobody else has the optimism, nobody else has the financial resources, and you might say nobody else, you know -- well, let me just leave it at that.
-- Steve Ballmer, on the his new iPod look-a-like
Hmm, what's he talking about? I have some guesses... here's my list of other things nobody else has:
• The complete disconnect between their appetite for dominance and their ability to actually ship stuff.
• Billions upon billions of dollars with which to subsidize their new products because there's no way people would pay what it costs Microsoft to develop and manufacture them.
• The ability to invent new 'standards' on almost daily basis and get the press to bite. Everybody COM? DirectThis? Active Stuff? Anything .Net? Playsforsurenoseriouslyunlessyouownthemostcommonplayeronthemarket? Live Everything?
"There really is a Sony that lives inside of us."
-- Steve Ballmer, again
You want to invent new audio standards nobody uses and make iPod clones that nobody buys, too? You know, I think you're up to the challenge, Mr. B.
In other news, the first of a series of interpretive paintings I'm having done of the Delicious Monster is now up on the intertron. I randomly found Brian Pike's website and loved his stuff, so I commissioned a monster from him.
I'll be selling a series of posters of the monster done in different artists' styles later in the year, when I collect more of these. If you're an artist, or you know an artist, you (or he or she) can get in on some of this commission action. The basic terms are, "Do a painting, in your style, of the Delicious monster doing what you think Delicious monsters do." [Keep in mind that the monster is a shy vegetarian who lives in a jungle and tries to avoid getting eaten.] Just send me a sketch of an idea (and some of your other work) and if I like it, I'll commission a full work (should be approximately 1' x 2' or so) for $450.
In the end, I get the painting and the copyright for the painting (so I can sell reproductions), but you can use the reproductions in your portfolio. I'll consider other media types, as well, if you have something compelling. The simplest e-mail address for me is wjs at apple's mail server, which is mac to the dot com, my sizzle.
And finally, Delicious Monster is officially looking for an artist who can do icons, interface elements, and, hopefully, gorgeous 3D renderings of real objects. Send your sample work (including a piece of furniture if you can do 3D -- is this a hint of something to come?) to me if you're interested.
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I'm kept alive by Delicious Library
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